Emotionless
by Dream-Bliss
Summary: Set long before the days of Katniss Everdeen, a young girl struggles on her journey through the Hunger Games. She has never let her emotions surface in the past, but will that strength soon become a weakness? Rated T. Please R
1. Chapter 1

**This is my first Hunger Games story. It is set long before the days of Katniss and Peeta. I hope you all enjoy, please R&R. I have rated this story M because of later chapters; there will be swearing, sex and bloody violence. Thank you.**

I'm good at reading people – that's why my mother used to say, followed by wearied sighs and looks of utter anguish. I'd have thought it was a gift, to be able to see into people's souls, sort the good from bad and those in between. But she never thought so.

This was probably due to the fact that I let it get in the way of everything. I'll be the first to admit that fact, because I know that it's true and that there's nothing much anyone can do about it. Boys have always tried to ask me on dates or offered to walk me home from school, but one look in their eyes and I shot them down. All of them. _He wants you for your body, _my mind would tell me. _He's looking for a rebound. That one's a little too feminine and weak. _And once, even: _He's gay but hasn't figured it out for himself yet. _Well, I didn't want to be the girl who helped him to establish it, did I?

You could say that my 'reading' skills have affected my relationships; by which I mean, I haven't had any. Ever. Not even a friend, because I know that they'll only stab me in the back, or they want to be with me because the boys might look at them for a change, or simply that they feel sorry for the lonely girl and want to make her look popular. I don't need these people, I can cope by myself. And that's exactly my status right now. I'm by myself.

I'm an orphan, but I'm not too upset about it. My mother was selfish and my father, although I never knew him, was a total jerk. They conceived me when they were both only 16 years old, on the day that my father was chosen in the reaping for the 12th Annual Hunger Games. Back then, victor's were allowed a whole hour with their family members to say goodbye, and my father liked to say goodbye with his penis. He had looked into my mothers' eyes and quite romantically said, "I don't want to die a virgin." Being a complete idiot, my mother took him up on this offer and nine months later I popped out. My father had died during the games. I didn't feel the loss.

My mother died when I was ten. It wasn't from heartbreak or stress. It wasn't because life was too hard being a single mother still grieving her lost love. It was because she was selfish and took her own life. One day, on the way home from school, the resident Peacekeeper Jyn had taken me aside and told me to go home with her instead. I obeyed, because that's what you do. Corrupt or not, a Peacekeeper is still a Peacekeeper. So I did as I was told and she ushered me into the warmth of her slightly more plush and well kept shack and told me everything. How my mother was found in the front yard, hanging by a thin rope by the neck, swinging on the porch. How she had a note in her hand, but all it had said was "I'm sorry."

Sorry wasn't good enough. Seven years on, and I'm coping. Like I said before, I don't need anyone to keep me going. Except for maybe today.

You see, today is the reaping for the 29th Hunger Games and I'm 17 years old, which means I'm still eligible to be a victor. My name is only in the bowl once, because living by yourself doesn't require that much food, especially when you're as small and slight as me. It also helps that I live in District 5, not exactly the poorest of the twelve Districts. We harness power, like electricity and nuclear. We provide the Capitol with their lights, and so their glamour. This means that the Peacekeepers are friendly and the food isn't rare. Not many children put forward for tesserae, and as I've said, I never have. I feel lucky living here though. Other Districts aren't so fulfilled.

I know that my possibilities of being chosen are as likely as the rest of the children here, due to the low rates of tesserae. I don't believe in luck, either. So when the bright turquoise coloured man calls out the name "Rhona Jade", I do not flinch, scream or panic. I simply take my place on the stage.


	2. Chapter 2

"Evan Dillinger!"

As the brightly dressed turquoise man announced this name, there were a few gasps from the crowd. No one gasped when they said my name, so I felt a little unloved for a moment – then I remembered, I have no friends or family.

A parting occurred in the crowd like they were creating a path for someone royal, and a tall boy of about my age came striding along, his arms rigid and his expression fixed. I liked him already because he didn't seem like he was depressed about the situation. It was more like how I was feeling; indifferent. He stood next to me and the turquoise man lifted our arms above our heads to confirm us as the victors, and we were ushered away into the Justice Building to await our families.

These days aren't like the days of my parents. You're only allowed fifteen minutes to say goodbye to whoever now. Luckily, I have no one, therefore I can just sit and relax to gather my bearings. The turquoise man entered my room and sat on the overly large leather sofa beside me, crossing his legs as though her were a woman. One look in his eyes indicated his sexual orientation, which then satisfied me that I weren't to be flirted with any time soon.

"You have no appointments." He said, pointedly, whilst scrolling down a rather large list. "At least nothing scheduled. Do you have family?"

"No, I'm orphaned, no siblings. No... boyfriend." I said the last word uneasily, as his ears had pricked up and he looked at me as though I were telling him that the world no longer existed.

"That's unfortunate to say the least!" He cried out dramatically. He swapped his crossed legs around, flicked his head back to remove the silly side fringe from his eyes and puckered his lips a little. "I guess I'll just have to keep you company for the mean time. My name's Kobra."

"I'm Rhona. Obviously. You just called out my name in front of all those people."

"_Those _people?" Kobra remarked, apparently astonished. "You say that like you don't know your own District."

I liked him already. He had a different way of reading people. "I don't. I mean to say, I have no relations in the slightest."

"That'll soon change." He tapped my nose with the end of his pen, sporting a knowing smile and then check his watch. "Oh. Must be off, dear. Come with me and we'll get you on that train. You can meet your male counterpart there."

_Oh dear, _I thought. _Sounds ominous. I don't think I want to meet my counterpart, even if my first impression of him was... was... what was it? _And suddenly I realised that for the first time ever, I hadn't made a reading of a person . I screwed up my face in confusion as I was led to wherever, trying for the life of me to understand why not. _I remember thinking that he was similar to me – no, wait, I thought that his facial expression mimicked my own. I didn't get a catch of his eyes properly, that's what it'll be. Maybe meeting him on the train will be interesting after all._

oOoOo

The train was as smooth as silk. I'd never ridden on a train before, so I didn't really know what to expect exactly but I had ridden in a coach and they lack suspension for the lumpy ground. I found that it was easy to simply walk around the train without fear of losing balance, falling over and hitting my head. We were told that we could explore as much as we liked so I took that offer up and searched for the place where I could find Evan – I needed to look at his eyes so I could make my first impression over again. Instead, when I stepped into what I could only assume to be some sort of dining area, I was met with a small, young woman with short, wavy black hair and bloodshot eyes. I remembered her as Fifi Regner, my mentor. She was there when my name was announced but I hadn't been paying too much attention. Her eyes told me that she was tired; indefinitely and irreversibly tired.

"Hello." I ventured, giving a slight wave. "Been up all night?"

"For about five years, yes." She replied scornfully, then noticed my taken-aback expression and shook her head solemnly. "I'm sorry, I get tetchy. Due to sleep deprivation."

"No, I shouldn't have introduced myself in that way. I'm Rhona."

"Yes you are." Fifi smiled. "Where's Evan? The other victor?"

"We were told to go to our rooms, change and then explore," I explained. "Then at two 'o' clock we should go to... well, here? To eat."

"It's nearly two." She glanced at the wall clock and sighed. "I haven't an appetite if I'm absolutely honest."

"Me neither," I confessed. "I'm too nervous about... you know... and I ate just before the victors announcement."

Just at this point, I heard the door open behind me and someone walked in. I seated myself around the table and looked up to see Evan finding himself a chair too. His eyes were downwards. They were always downwards. He found a place and stared at the table, exchanging introductions with Fifi before beginning to fiddle with his fingers. I couldn't quite see his eyes, it was annoying. So I decided to describe his other aspects and see what I could make out from that instead. He had thin blonde hair that fitted about his face so that it was framed. He was quite skinny and weedy to be perfectly fair, which I didn't like. But hey, how could I talk? I had to weight of an apple and the frame of a starving cat.

The one thing I couldn't stop thinking about was how he hadn't yet spoken to me.

How rude.

I ducked my head about for a while, trying to meet his gaze without seeming intimidating, but Fifi must've noticed my investigative head bouncing because she put a hand on my arm so that I looked up sharply.

"Are you okay? The food will be here as soon as Kobra gets here."

"Oh!" I tried to think of an excuse for my behaviour, but nothing came to mind. "Sorry. I was just... excuse me?" I directed this to Evan, and he briefly looked up only to fall back into line. "I was wondering what your name is."

"Evan, you already know that." Fifi frowned. She didn't understand my frustration, obviously.

"Yeah but it would've been nice if he had at least acknowledged my presence." I bit back. "I'm sat here waiting for at least a 'hello' like what you got!"

"Hello." Evan unexpectedly piped up. I raised my brows and pursed my lips. He continued, "I'm sorry. I just... I don't make friends very well."

"Pfft," I scoffed, remembering the gasps from the crowd when his name had been called and how I hadn't even got so much as a blink.

Suddenly, the door swung open and Kobra swept into the room as though a gust of wind had caught him updrift. He swanned about the room with a sickeningly sweet smile on his face and seated himself between me and Fifi. "Hello, all!"

"Hey Kobra." Both Evan and I said in unison. I scowled at him and continued, "Thank you for the clothes. They're nice."

When I had got to my personal room on this train, a drawer full of clothes was waiting. I had been told to wear whatever I wanted as long as it wasn't what I was already wearing. So I chose a red glossy dress that showed off my bum and boobs. I wanted to feel grand, but I wasn't trying to get attention. Honest.

"Yes, you look amazing!" Kobra beemed. "Food is here! Don't mind the mutes. We don't!"

I looked around and saw the waiter and waitress, but didn't understand what he had meant about mutes. Perhaps they didn't like to talk, like my friend Evan here? I angered just thinking about him and felt myself turning red so I quickly snatched up some bread that had been placed on the table and used it to scoop up the duck soup that had been laid before me. It tasted delicious, and I wanted to say so, but Evan got there first.

"Nice soup." He smiled. Oh, a smile? I never got a smile! And why must he always glance away when I looked at him? Am I that ugly? Do I have something on my face?

"Thank you, Evan." Kobra smiled back.

"Don't thank him, he didn't make it, he can't even make salad." Fifi joked. Evan laughed. Laughter now? That was enough to send my blood boiling.

"What the hell?" I yelled, standing up and almost spilling my delectable soup all over the table cloth. "You can say hello to them. You can smile at them. You can laugh with them. But what do I get? A sideways glance if I'm bloody lucky! Did I do something to you? Huh? Did I make a bad impression? Because I sure as hell can't understand you yet and it's driving me MAD!"

Everyone was staring at me. I grabbed my napkin, wiping my hands and threw it onto the table. "I'm going. Have a pleasant meal."


End file.
